Day 1 First Show in Edinburgh...and boy am I gonna lose my shirt, but thats OK.

I make bad financial decisions. I assume I inherited this from my dad who had a choice to invent in video games in the early 80's or a polyurethane apple box for orchardists that lasted for years instead of plywood ones which last a couple years. Not realizing the orchardists had no inclination to pay hundreds of dollars for something they could build for dollars...

So in the middle of this centuries worst recession I took all my savings and went into 5k of debt to perform in this years Edinburgh festival. And I got some news...

I ain't gonna make it back:)

Its almost a relief though. I was so stressed about it, but now I can deal with the closure. And it sucks a little bit, but I just can't compete with the marketing that surrounds me. I mean as funny and as good as my show is( and it really is). I'm not easily marketed.

I walk around and see posters for all these shows that I would way rather see than mine. Just beautifully artistic pieces, and stunning concept pieces and colorful eyecatching pieces. then mine, which if it was by itself would look ok, but it's an average penis in a well hung gangbang of posters.

And on top of marketing, there are some great name acts here, that makes me think why would anyone come see an unknown like me? The got Rys Darby, Janeane Garafolo, Rhod Gilbert, Russell Kane etc... It almost doesn't make sense to see me.

But there is peace in that. Now I can keep my expectations nice and low. And maybe, the crowds will be wonderful like tonight's was:) small, intimate friendly. And I'll have a wonderful month of delightful shows, where I lose a ton of money. But I get to summer here and see alot of great acts.

So here's to accepting reality. And enjoying the present. Happy apathy. Hapathy:)

Pete J